Things to Say Today:
1. Focus like a lazer beam. Check
2. Go narrow and deep. Check
3. As I always say (note: remember to say this first bit), “Don’t write more, write better!” Check
4. Hey, anonymous student, do you hear that annoying buzzing in the ba - yeah that’s me! Check
5. You all know what I say about “one”… DON’T USE IT! Check
6. Now, look at both of my hands. Some of us are on this hand, group A, which is improving. Group B is staying in the same place. And look at what group C is doing (note: pretend not to notice the confused faces). Check
7. Everything you’ve been taught about American history is a lie. Check
8. Now, I’m not trying to show off with what I wrote on the screen, but this really is a perfect essay. Absolutely no mistakes. Does anyone have one that is better? Oh, come on, don’t be shy. Check
9. (to anonymous student) You will never get hired if you don’t cover your mouth when you yawn. Check
10. Class, you’ve done great today. I will buy you all cookies and let you rustle the bags as much as you want! Hmmm… I don’t remember saying this
This really brought me back. What a guy. :’)
Almost crying omg. Please don’t retire.
(Source: princessofthesky)
